(Written for practicing devotees of Sri Chaitanaya Sarasvat Math)
The sound of Name is not Name proper. But is it useless?
The feeling of chanting Hari Nam desperately has arisen from necessity for positive engagement fueled by frustration and luck of purpose. Hari Nam gives hope and refreshment to the mind and... (as saints say) the soul. (I have no such realization). I only know that by chanting hari nam I get refreshed, calm and can see things more clear. Of course this is a mundane effect of Hari Nam on the condition soul. Nevertheless this tells me that Hari Nam is very powerful. When coming to Sri Chaitanya Sarasvat Math we learn from Srila BR Sridhar Maharaj that the name of the Lord descends to the tong of a chanter when the call is devoid of selflessness and heart is empty of any other shelter but Krisha. That is very high profile. Srila Sridhar Maharaj, quoting Jagadananda Pundit and Vasudev Gosh Thakur, shows us that the syllabus "Ha-re", "Krish-na", "Ra-ma" are not the Name proper. He proves us that the holy name or divine sound vibration is independent yet no-different from its source, bhinnatvan nama namino. It (or it is proper to say He) can do anything through Its (His own) power to make someone's heart melt or not.
Accepting such high standard we tend to minimize our own chanting. We sometimes reduce our chanting or even stop chanting altogether. We may develop thinking that since our chanting in our present position is almost useless and not-effective, and that we chant it out of duty as a promise to our diksha guru and that we are not sadhakas who do their routine to attain prema bhakti, we are worthless and unqualified to properly chant the Hari Nam. So we stop, reduce or undermine our chanting. We forget that Nama Acharyya Srila Haridas Thakur declared that chanting of Nam on the stage of Namaabhas (imperfect) can bring one to the gates of Vaikuntha. Yes, I know, we are not heading there, but this is to show the power of the Hari Nam.
Are we loosers?
Yes we are, but in a particular way. We are beggars for the almighty mercy but should we feel incompetent and disconnected? I would say, no. As much as we desire desperately the gift of saranagati (heartfelt surrender), we should desire happy effect to our practice. To think that because we are not chanting on a highest level of Krishna Consciousenss we are not getting the glimpse of an infinite mercy, is to deny Infinite its infinity. If the Sweet Absolute is Infinite then what is not within His unlimited possibilities? Sri Rupagoswamipada sais na krishti krita chetasam sumanasam... na diksha na cha sat kriya mana... the Name is divine and it can do wanders. It can make someone blessed with Its beauty randomly, despite no qualifications on the part of a chanter . So why not us who has committed ourselves to Its Divine Cause? Are we a looser? Certainly not. We are benefited by each heartfelt offering to our Divine Master and Lord. Sri Krishna is called Sweetness Personified and His devotee is very kind, so why aren't we happily chanting His names every day with enthusiasm? I think we should, even-though we are told that on our platform our "chanting is a duty to our Gurudeva."
Self-deception is our friend
No way! But if we think for a while... Anything can be used for the service to my Master. My self-deceit can lead me to the realization that I am actually making harm to myself. Being retrospective helps and this is what Srila Guru Maharaj calls, atma nikshepa, or self-analysis. Omitting this point, this paragraph has no meaning.
I can bring down my deceitful tendencies by sincere reading books of Srila BR Sridhar Maharaj. Prapanna Jivamrita and Sermons part I, II, III & IV are perfect books for disease of self-deceitfulness. Śrila Govinda Maharaj told me once "read all books of Guru Maharaj regularly, our life is very short." The bhakti jnan coming from his books will unveil the masquerade of deceit in our mind and heart. Just keep reading with full attention and share what you have read with other devotees. We are all on the same boat. So keep sharing.
10/5/10
Sermons, part II, chapter 12 - Earnestness
A blind man, with no experience of form or color, could see by His will. So if His position is such then what our attitude should be in approaching Him? "How much earnestness should we have to approach that land? It is easy - it is difficult. Easy, because it is our inborn tendency. It is our home. But now we are far away from home. It is home, my own, so there is hope that I may reach there one day."
Now I am hopeful.
This is what is to be considered as knowledge. All knowledge is with Him. What I know is nonsense. My experience and calculation is not a real knowledge through which I can know Him. More I know of this world the more I am filled with poison. Because any amount of information cannot grasp His infinite state of art. If I ma ready to admit this I will have a chance to know Him to the point He wants me to know. Then I will consider to be fully knowledgeable. Like a cup that was filled with ocean water. He himself said "the knowledge of this world is just an insignificant spark of the whole manifestation of Him." Not knowing this we are deceiving ourselves. Why? Because the so-called education will create a sense of pride that is very difficult to remove. It it somewhat better to deal with an ignorant man of the street then a scholar. But also a religious man who has the ego of a religious man is difficult to convince to be a man of a real faith. Both are proud of their position thinking they know.
vedasraya nastikya vada baudhake adhika (CC. Madhya 6.168) Half truth is more dangerous than a falsehood.
It is better to be ignorant at the front of the Lord. That's why when we go to see the Lord in the temple we are there to be seen by Him.
"(...)If we have to admit God, then we have nothing. If we are His created objects, play dolls, we have nothing. As soon as we have admitted God, then we are dispossessed of everything! So much renunciation is impossible. To hold that 'I am the absolute authority' means that I am nowhere. Such self-abnegation is not so cheap!"
Now I am hopeful.
This is what is to be considered as knowledge. All knowledge is with Him. What I know is nonsense. My experience and calculation is not a real knowledge through which I can know Him. More I know of this world the more I am filled with poison. Because any amount of information cannot grasp His infinite state of art. If I ma ready to admit this I will have a chance to know Him to the point He wants me to know. Then I will consider to be fully knowledgeable. Like a cup that was filled with ocean water. He himself said "the knowledge of this world is just an insignificant spark of the whole manifestation of Him." Not knowing this we are deceiving ourselves. Why? Because the so-called education will create a sense of pride that is very difficult to remove. It it somewhat better to deal with an ignorant man of the street then a scholar. But also a religious man who has the ego of a religious man is difficult to convince to be a man of a real faith. Both are proud of their position thinking they know.
vedasraya nastikya vada baudhake adhika (CC. Madhya 6.168) Half truth is more dangerous than a falsehood.
It is better to be ignorant at the front of the Lord. That's why when we go to see the Lord in the temple we are there to be seen by Him.
"(...)If we have to admit God, then we have nothing. If we are His created objects, play dolls, we have nothing. As soon as we have admitted God, then we are dispossessed of everything! So much renunciation is impossible. To hold that 'I am the absolute authority' means that I am nowhere. Such self-abnegation is not so cheap!"
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